K.S.Natarajan my friend for past 60 years

My friend  and classmate Kalakkad Sundaram Natarajan –Who played an important role in my life

By

P.R.Ramahander

After I completed my post graduation in Annamalai University, (1960) I was lucky to get admission in the Indian Statistical Institute, Calcutta. On the day that I had to start to Calcutta, I received an appointment order as Statistical assistant in National Sample Survey in Trivandrum. I knew that I should accept that because the financial condition of the family was not good. But my great father told me that I should study further, because I was getting stipend. He said he will manage the affairs of the family for two or three years more. The first problem to be solved was dress. For the five years preceding, I was wearing only white Dhothi and White shirt. I along with my father felt that I should at least have a few pants. There was no tailor in my village who could stitch pants. The time left was short. Father had a very close friend Sethu mama , who was running a hotel in Vishakapatnam en route. My cousin Visweswaran was working in his hotel. I got down there by one train and within a day, a few white, poor looking pants were stitched at lightning speed. Next day I reached Calcutta. I had not spoken in the phone till then and for the first time was forced to call the warden of the hostel to get directions. That gentleman was speaking a benglish accent. Some how, I reached ISI. I stayed there in the hostel for the next one year. I made many friends. .

    Sri  Kalakkad  Sundaram Natarajan  a son of school teacher  Sundarm Iyer  of Thirunelveli, became  one of my closest friends there. It was through him that  I became friends   with other  Tamil   and Malayalam speaking  people who were  in ISI hostel  . (For example  DR.K.R.,Parthasarathy, who  joined    the mathematics s department of IIT , Madras, Sri T.A.Anathaswamy Row   who  joined Brakes India Limited Madras . DR.Balasubramanian who joined later   as  professor in Christian college , Madras , One Mr.Krishnan who was a great sportsman and joined  ,IIM , Calcutta  for further   studies, Dr.G.Narayana Murthy  of Batlakundu  who settled down in  Mumbai, Dr.N.C.Chidambaran  and DR.Panchapakesan   who   both  settled   down  as professors in USA , then itself, DR.SWaminthan   who went to Canada   and settled down there , DR.P,S.Nair(still a face book friend)  , DR.T  Sankaran Kutti , Dr.Subramanyam Swamy   who is now  Rajya Sabha MP  and so on and on) ,Though I   became friends   with all of them ,I was specially attached  to  Sri.K.S.Natarajan and I always think , he played a great role in making me what I am today.

    After  one year , when he had vacation ,  we   both had saved some money  from our stipend  and we wanted   to buy   some presents   to  our family members ,We went to Ballygunge   and  waited it Rash Behari avenue for some time    and  located a  Tamilan Brahmin mami . We both told about our problems and she helped us . I remember   that   during   those times  Calcutta  Karandi was   famous  and we bought  one each, That Mami   also directed us to a shop   selling Saris . I remember   we bought one each., Both of us went to Delhi from there some time in July . Our North Indian class mates in New Delhi   scared us by saying that  unless   we buy a suit   we both will die in winter . We were wondering what to do   and fortunately met a senior of ours called Sri.V,Gopalan. When we  told about our problem, he said   he was very much alive   after passing through a winter  wearing a  half swetter. That time  we were  getting slightly more stipend. I remember  we purchased   one each of a rexine  brown suitcase and one each of a  reversible double coloured  pull over.

   Life went on. I specialised   in Biometrics  of tree crps and my   friend rose to very high positions  in  Census commissioners office.

   My friend  Kalakkad Sundaram Natarajan is a face book member like me   and has settled down in Madras   and I have   settled down in Bangalore. Our friendship as on today is nearly sixty years old.

   My deep sense of gratitude  my friend

Negative images  of  Indian daughter  in law? (Pardon   for sheer  exaggeration), which I do not agree at all 

By

P.R.Ramachander

Most of the  inlaws  of a girl   think all their problems including  their   sickness, dementia   or being put  in an  old age  home  is squarely  due to the daughter  in law . I always  thought   that  it was an old women’s tale   and such   things  have disappeared  and I happened to read an article by scholarly  face book friend  Jabalimuni Putrevu  based on  the writing of one  Dr.Hemant Mittal (social influencer and Motivational writer) .Do such circumstances  hinted below exist   for modern daughter in laws ? Though I have listed  a few based i on the above article , I some how feel  it does not exist nowadays . Exagerration no doubt , I am sure  it would shake  the erring in laws (micro percentage)

1,Daughter  in laws   are  outsiders,

So discuss  nothing in front of them,

Daughter  in laws are thieves ,

Who have   stolen our son.

2.Daughter in law  does not know ,

About   the needs   of our home ,

And she needs to get adjusted  to ,

Our home,. Its  people   and their needs.

3. Our son  might have   been a  useless  drunkard,

Who specialises  in loving  one lady after  another,

But   we have  brought  a daughter  in law  to correct him,

And  if he is not able to do that , it is her fault not our sons.

4.Daughter in laws are   our slaves,

Who should   cater   to our monetary needs,

Both by   doing all our jobs    as also ,

By handing over to us   all that   she earns

5.Daughter  in law   can and should  cook in our house ,

But the recipes   she uses   should not be that  of her home,

But  that  of our home , taught to her  in a shoddy way,

And if it is not Okay , we can and will  shout   against her.

6.Daughter  in laws  parents   are outsiders,

They can visit us   but with ample presents,

But  after   wedding  it is not the responsibility,

Of Daughter in law  to help them or   spend for them.

7.However   efficient and gracious   she is,

And even if daughter in law   serves us well,

She  can never   become our    daughter,

Who is an angel   who has all rights in  our home.

8.If Daughter in law   does not present us ,

With a baby within one or two years after  marriage ,

It is entirely   her fault   and never can be fault  of our son,

And we   have the right to talk about it behind her  as well as in her front,

The letter of a daughter to her dear daddy

The letter  of a daughter  to her dear daddy

Translated by

P.R.Ramachander

( i found    this heart moving  poem in  tamil posted by Banumathy Kannan  and many others  .When I read it  my   eyes filled with tears. My thanks to the original author   , whoever he/she is )

You are  the  first lover   whom I loved,

But  do not ask me  when I started  lovng you , Daddy,

It would have happened   when you talked to me ,

Keeping  your hands caressing  the belly  of my mother.

Or it could have happened   when you  took me  in your hands ,

And fondled me   and kissed  me even before my umbilical chord  had not been taken out.

Though mummy told me  thousands of  pretty  stories   and made me sleep,

I never got   the pleasure that I got   when I slept on your   broad chest.

My eyes would be searching for you   when my  mummy gave me bath,

Possibly because you were  an expert  in giving bath  without hurting  my eyes.

I do not remember  my feet  ever touching    the floor ,

After I  learnt to walk  , for I   remember   sitting   always on your shoulders,

With the  anklets of my legs   touching  the buttons of your shirt,

I do  remember  Daddy, your celebrating saying , “The angel has  been,

Born as my daughter” , When I wore a  new petticoat with  little gems,

Why did   you  earn the  chidings of ma when you brought  me sweets,

From the shop  , though she had told , “even rice is not there  in the home  to cook.”

Except me who knows you better Daddy, at the time   when  you  forced  me ,

To sit on the school bench and moved away  with a tear filled   eyes?

When I stood    with great shyness , twiddling   the corner  of my Half Sari,

Possibly thinking that  not much time is left  for me to part from  you,

You wiped off  the rain of tears  from your eyes  with no one noticing it .

Though  I used to argue   and fight   with you always  , Oh Daddy,

I never ever  disobeyed    your words   any time  , Oh Daddy,

Without any   sense of shame   you used   to tell   very tall lies  ,

And praise  any  hoeless food   that  I tried    to cook  just for you, Daddy,

There  used  to be a love  at that time   even  in your lies  , Daddy,

If some one  asks me , whether  you who used  to fulfil,

All my desires just by   the move of my eyes is equal to god ,

I would say “No”,because  God gives boons  only if you have devotion,

But   you who protect me always  without any expectation is yourself a great boon.

Why is it that  you who  never used to be bothered   about even for a mountain like sorrow,

Used to  get broke  down completely  when you see a drop of tears in my   eyes?

You have never forced me to accept anything  that I did not like,

And you never   did hate  any of my likes

My only worry is that  once   you send me to my husband’s home,

There   would  be no one   who is left  there  to console  you , Oh daddy,

I would never   ever   compare    you with my husband  because I know,

You are the only male  of this entire world   who loves me completely,

I never   think that  I would be born once more  , Daddy,

But if that happens, please    give me   a boon,

To   become   once again  my father  , Oh daddy

Lord Gruruvayrappan

Lord Gruruvayrappan

By

Kumar Ramanathan

Translated by

P.R.Ramachander

(The very pretty  verse  in Tamil of the author is given below my translation.Thanks to the author. I am also borrowing the  pretty picture  of Baby Krishna posted by him in facebook)

Oh Guruvayurappa, I  saw the very pretty peacock feather  moving on your head,

Oh Guruvayurappa, i saw  a smile   caressing   your face,

Oh Guruvayurappa,I saw the perfume of sandle paste  wafting up everywhere,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I saw the  thulabharam   being weighed,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I heard   the  sound  of your flute,

Oh Guruvayurappa,I heard   the sound of “OM, OM” being chanted,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I heard the booming sound of  Pancha Vadhya,

Oh Guruvayurappa,I saw   your devotees becoming ecstatic,

Oh Guruvayurappa,I saw the beauty of Pananquin on the elephant,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I saw your form   that   puts an end to fate,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I forgot  the strength of the early morning cold,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I was anxious to see you   and I  was able to see your divine form,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I saw little babes    eating rice,

Oh Guruvayurappa, I saw the prettiness of  your cheeks with pretty  dimples  when you smile,

Oh Guruvayurappa, Oh Krishna, Oh Krishna  who is of the    colour of the cloud,

Oh Guruvayurappa, your  lotus like feet is my only refuge

Tamil text by  Kumar  Ramanathan

ஸ்ரீ குருவாயூரப்பன் எழில் அழகு பீலி தலையில் அசையக்கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

முகத்தில் புன்னகை தவழக் கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

சந்தனமெங்கும் மணக்க கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

துலாபாரம் தூக்கக் கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

ஓடக்குழலின் ஓசையை கேட்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

ஓம் ஓம் என்னும் ஒலியை கேட்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

பஞ்ச வாத்யம் முழங்கக் கேட்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

பக்தர்கள் பரவசம் அடைய கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

வேழச் சிவிகையின் எழிலை கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

வினை தீர்க்கும் வடிவம் கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

காலை குளிரின் கடுமையை மறந்தேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

காணத் துடித்தேன் கண்டேன் தரிசனம் குருவாயூரப்பா

குழந்தைகள் சாதம் உண்னக் கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

குமிழ் சிரிப்பின் இதழகைக் கண்டேன் குருவாயூரப்பா

கண்ணா கண்ணா கார் முகில் வண்ணா குருவாயூரப்பா

உன் திருவடி மலரே சரணம் சரணம் குருவாயூரப்பா! !

Try to catch God’s blessings

Try to catch  God’s blessings

By

P.R.Ramachander

(Based i on a story   told by Sri Sukhi Sivam which I got from Whatsapp. My acknowledgements to   that great scholar)

It was a village deep in South india,

Where in people walked  one  mile,

To the river   to bring a pot of water,

And one day  the  skies  opened up,

And there was a heavey downpour of rain,

And the grandma   called her  grand daughter,

And said “Please keep  the big vessel  in the rain,

So that   we can get  lots and lots of water.”

But  the little one was reluctant   and when chided,

Dragged  a big vessel    and kept it in the rain ,

And  after the rain  , with great expectations  ,

Of lots and lots of water , the grandma ,

Went outside , only to see  that ,

The vessel was closed   with a lid,

And  there was not even a   single  drop of water saved

God  showers   his blessings    like a torrential  rain,

With   an open mind  , you could catch it all ,

But with a closed  mind , you would not get even a drop,

And so when you lack God’s blessings , blame yourselves and not God

Philosophy of life taught by our food

Philosophy of life taught  by our food

By

P.R.Ramachander

(It is only a rewriting  in my own style what I got  free  in Tamil through whatsapp .I thank the original author)

Defeat   is like asafoetida ,

It would be bitter  to taste,

But if mixed  in sambhar the victory,

It would   add    aroma   to it

(Without defeats victory is inspid)

Be  always  like a  pressure   cooker,

When pressure mounts ,

Celebrate  it  by whisting,

And let out   all pressure.

(Let out tension by celebrating)

Aim  in  our  life    as well   as ,

An egg    are   greatly   fragile,

Once it slips   it   breaks.

(Be stable   with your aims)

Laziness  is like   the stalk  of chillies

For  adding pungency, It   should  be nipped.

(Laziness should be nipped off for adding pungency to life)

Life   is complicated  like Idiyappam(rice noodles),

If  you add  the love   called coconut milk ,

Complications    would  indeed disappear

(Love   removes knots and complications)

Lie   is as slippery as   noodles,

But Truth    is   as stable as an Idli.

(Lies  give  temporary  victory only)

Anger  is   much more  like salt ,

When used in excess , life is not tastey.

(Too much anger  leads us no where)

Delayed   victory  is like fried  savouries,

WE   get   after   we loose our teeth ,

You cannot enjoy   what    you get.

(you should get everything in time )

Formula  for  self confidence ,

Is like   the recipes  we get for cooking,

Using them properly  is in your  hands.

(Achieving  victory by using  known methods  are in your hands)

Achieving  victory  is like cooking Idli,

Only after  you cook  you will know,

Whether it is useful  or well cooked

(Only after   completion of a job , we know whether   we have won or not)

Enjoying victory  is like  eating Idli,

Without  friends to share , yoiu cannot enjoy,

And without side dishes  Idli  would  not be tastey

(to enjoy anything , company is needed) 

The real seven wonders of of our life

The real   seven wonders of  of our life

By

Sivan  Krishnan

Translated by

P.R.Ramachander

(Each of were   taught about the seven wonders of the world, which none of us can afford to see and here is a great devotee  of God seeing the seven wonders  below the roof of his home.I could not match his emotional language   and so I am giving   the Tamil original  below   my translation.)

The grand son came  running of  the school   and hugged his Grandpa,

And told him , “In today’s class   we learnt  about the   seven wonders of the world,

And we    also saw their pictures” but grandpa said    to his grandson ,

“My treasure, these  things are great no doubt   but they   are not the  seven wonders.”

The little tiny     tot requested   his grandpa    to tell him  , what those seven where?

And the grandpa  told , “The  first and greatest   wonder   to every one  is his mother,

For   she is the one who welcomed  them   in this world   and loved and cherished them,

Without any time   thinking of what  a  buden they  were   and how much they troubled  her”

Grandpa continued, “ Every one’s father   is the  second greatest   wonder   for,

He is the one  who  night  and day toiled  so that  each of  them were  happy,

And the greatest   wonder   of the world    is their own siblings  ,

Because it was   they who taught them  what affection is and how great is sharing.”

The grand son got bored and told grandpa   that  his list is not at all interesting ,

And ran away to play  but the boys mother   wanted   to know  about the other  four wonders,

And Grandpa  continued, “ Friends of either sex taught    every one,

Broad vision , the need  to understand their love and nature  of loving another  person.”

“The  fifth  is  the consort of every one , who chose   to sacrifice their all,

And showed only love towards   them , clearly  understanding   their limitations.

The sixth    greatest wonder   is ofcourse   their children  , who made ,

Each of them unselfish and  made them sacrifice  everything for them just like  that.”

The mother  of the little one enjoyed    the   list of the    great   wonders of the world,

And asked, “What   about the seventh one pa?”  and the grandpa    told with a  smile,

“It is   the grandchildren, for they  made  oldies  like me and your ma  ,who were ,

About to say bye  to the world, want to live again and they also gave us  matchless  joy.”

     வாழ்வின்  ஏழு உலக அதிசயங்கள்


''தாத்தா,   எங்க டீச்சர்  இன்னிக்கும்  ''உலக அதிசயங்கள்  ஏழு தெரியுமா?   என்று  கேட்டாள் . எனக்கு தெரியலை.  உனக்கு தெரியுமா. சொல்லு ''  கோபு  தாத்தாவை கேட்டான்.

''அடே  பயலே,  எனக்கு  தெரிந்த  ஏழு அதிசயங்கள்  வேறே . புத்தகங்களில் இல்லாதது.  தனியாக அதற்கு படமும் கிடையாது'' என்றேன்.

''அது என்ன தாத்தா அப்படிப்பட்ட  7  அதிசயங்கள்?

''உனக்கு சொன்னால் புரியுமா என்று தெரியவில்லை.  இருந்தாலும் ஒரு நாள் உனக்கும் தெரிந்து தானே ஆகவேண்டும். அதை இப்போதே தெரிந்து கொள்ளேன்.

1.  உங்க அம்மா இருக்கிறாளே  அவள் தான் இந்த உலகில், அதாவது உன் வாழ்க்கையில் முதல் அதிசயம்.

  '' என்ன தாத்தா  சொல்றீங்க  நீங்க?
 '' ஆமாண்டா,   அவள் தாண்டா  உன்னை இந்த  உலகத்திலேயே  வரவேற்ற  முதல் மனுஷி''.

2.  உங்க .அப்பா  இருக்கிறாரே  அவர்  தான் ரெண்டாவது அதிசயம். நீ சிரித்துக்கொண்டே இருக்க வேண்டும் என்று என்ன பாடெல்லாம் பட்டிருக்கிறார் என்று உனக்கு தெரியுமா?'' 

3  ''எது உனக்கு வேண்டுமோ அதை  மற்றவரோடு  பகிர்ந்து கொள்ள வைத்த,  பாசம் என்றால் என்ன  என்று புரிந்து கொள்ள  உதவிய முதல் ஜீவனை  கொடுத்தவர்.  . எனவே  தான்  உன்னுடன் கூடப் பிறந்தவனோ/(ளோ )  தான் மூன்றாவது அதிசயம்.

'' போதும் போதும்''   என்று கோபு ஓடிவிட்டாலும் அருகில் இருந்த கமலா டீச்சர் ''தாத்தா சார்  மேலே சொல்லுங்க, குழந்தைக்கு என்ன புரியும். எனக்கு சொல்லுங்க''  என்றாள்.   அடுத்த வீட்டுக்காரி.  பேசாமல் வந்து இதுவரை நான் பேசியதை எல்லாம் கேட்டுக்கொண்டிருந்தவள்.

4.  ''நண்பனோ  நண்பியோ  தான் வாழ்வில்  நான்காவது அதிசயம்.  விசால புத்தி,  மனோபாவம், மற்றவரை புரிந்து கொள்ளும் தாராள மனம் நட்பு என்று ஒருவரை ஒருவர் நேசிக்கும் ஸ்வபாவம் வர காரணமானவர்கள்.

5.  அடுத்தது.  குறைகளை நோக்காமல் நிறைகளை மட்டுமே பார்க்கும்  தன்மை  யாரால் முதலில் வந்தது என்றால்  உன் மனதை முதலில் கொள்ளை கொண்ட  பெண்ணோ ஆணோ தான். உலகையே,  பெற்றோரையோ, மற்றோரையோ,  அவனுக்காகவோ, அவளுக்காகவோ  எதிர்க்கும் தைரியம் வந்தது அந்த அதிசயப்  பிறவியால்  தான்.  எனவே அந்த ஜீவனே வாழ்வில் கண்ட  ஐந்தாவது அதிசயம். மனைவியோ கணவனோ.

6. ஆறாவது அதிசயம் என்ன தெரியுமா?  உன் பிள்ளையோ   பெண்ணோ  தான் .

 உன்னை சுயநலமற்றவனாக மாற்றிய முதல் ஜீவன். உன்னைவிட மற்றவர் நலம் பற்றி நீ அறிய,  எண்ணங்கள் உன் மனதில் உதிக்க, வைத்த  அபூர்வ பிறவி. பிள்ளைக்கோ பெண்ணுக்கோ விட்டுக்கொடுக்காத, தியாகம் செய்யாத அப்பனோ அம்மாவோ உலகிலேயே இல்லையே.

''அசாத்தியமாக இருக்கிறது சார்'' கடைசி ஏழாவது அதிசயம் என்று எதை சொல்ல்லப்போறீங்க?'' --  கமலா..

7. வாழ்க்கையிலே இன்னும் என்னம்மா  பாக்கி இருக்கு.   கடைசியாக  இது தான்  ஏழாவது அதிசயம் என்று கொள்வது ஒருவனது பேரன் பேத்தி தான்..

''அடே கிழவா, கிழவியே , உனக்கு   மீண்டும் உலகில் வாழவேண்டும் என்ற ஆசையை, எண்ணத்தை முதலில் வளர்த்த அதிசயங்கள். திரும்பவும் உன் வாழ்க்கை சக்கரம் உருண்டோட காரணமானவர்கள் இந்த அற்புதன் பேரன் பேத்திகள்  தானே. அவர்களுக்காக நீ  டான்ஸ் ஆடலையா , பாடலையா,  குதித்து  தூக்கிக்கொண்டு ஓடி விளையாடவில்லையா.  சிலர்  குட்டிக்கரணம் கூட போட்டதில்லையா? அப்படியென்றால் இது நிச்சயம் அதிசயமில்லையா?''.