Son replies to his mother who advised him after marriage

Son   replies  to his mother   who advised  him after marriage

By

P.R.Ramachander

(Many of you might have read , how a wise mother   advised her son about  how to treat his wife. Here is his reply )

Mother  mine  the wishes and advices ,

That you gave me on this day  ,

When I am taking  the new steps ,

To enter life of matrimony  are indeed great.

I would be following    them in toto ,

So that the matrimonial life mine ,

Would be  much more  like a great paradise,

Rather than    the very suffering hell.

Mother  mine   , by age    and experience ,

You are   much , much greater than me ,

And so I am placing before   you .

Very humble requests  rather than advices.

The girl who has   wed me  very recently,

Has  been brought up   in the modern  times,

When  every individual   dreams and dreams,

To live  as  per , what they think is liked  by them.

I know  a lot about    her  already  because ,

Just from the day   I saw   her and  she said yes,

We have been  texting each other without stop,

And  talking with each other lots and lots.

I am sure   while spending    her very cosy life,

With her  doting parents   and loving siblings,

She must   have  herself  dreamt and decided,

What her married life  would be  going to be.

She  must have   possibly   thought ,

That her life    from now onwards,

Would be  a great march  of happiness,

With  the love that we  would share.

So I request you mother   to understand,

That the time when you   were a girl like her,

Has changed     extremely  greatly,

And her dreams and aspirations  are different from yours.

Though    she is interested   in cooking   and other chores

She   as all youngsters want   to do it in their own  way ,

Which she  has learnt     from her  mother  or laptop,

And would not like   you   to teach her   that any time.

From tomorrow  morn as   soon as we wake up,

She would be  gobbling    some  Corn flakes,

And start   running   to the bus stand ,

So that   she  reaches  her office in time.

Ofcourse   she would  be returning   from there,

Very late   at night   and if  you had cooked for her,

She would eat   it  and thank you   for that,

Before getting prepared  for office for the next day.

Though   we would  be seeing   each other   daily  at night,

May  be we   may not have  much time   to speak .

As both of  us    would be  as tired  as wet hens ,

And as soon as we hit the bed we will sleep.

Yes, the week ends   would  come every week,

When you   would be   able to see   and talk ,

With us both   but   some time   around noon,

When we   both  get up after  a  good sleep.

But  we would not expect   you to cook for us,

As   we would be  eating  in some  good hotel,

And come back   in the evening after shopping,

And sure mother  she  would cook  dinner for us  .

Whenever   we both     do get time  mother  ,

WE would talk to you   and make  you happy ,

 We  are   sure   that      you would be a great asset,

For us, as you would look after  our children  when they are born.

The animal in man is unfortunately blind

The animal   in man  is  unfortunately  blind

A poem  dedicated to my  tearful sisters and mothers,

By

P.R.Ramachander

(I saw the material for writing this posted  by  sri Anantha Narayanan and I have  rewritten it in my own style )

Whether a  girl  wears a Sari,

Whether she  wears a  Chudidhar.

Or even when she  is covered with Burqua,

She becomes  a  victim   to the  animal in man

And so  the problem is  not in her dress.

Whether the girl  is three  years old,

Whether she is sweet sixteen,

Or whether    she is past seventy,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the problem   is not in her   age.

Whether  the Girl  Hindu forward caste,

Whether the girl belongs to a Dalit family ,

Or Whether    she practices Islam  or follows Jesus

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the problem is  not in caste or religion.

Whether   the girl is an unmarried maid,

Whether  she is the mother  of few children,

Or whether   she is    a sister or mother,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the problem is not the  stage of her life.

Whether   the   Girl is from Punjab or hAryana,

Whether   she is from  Bihar or Bengal,

Or whether   she is from Kerala or Tamil Nadu  ,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the problem   is not the state  she lives in.

Whether  the  girl talks   chaste  Hindi,

Whether   she talks   the convent English,

Or Whether she talks  in any other language ,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the problem is not in the  language she speaks.

Whether   the girl is jet back in colour .

Whether   she is white like marble ,

Or whether  she is an attractive red,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so the  problem is not in her colour

Whether  she is dumb , deaf    or Mad,

Whether   she is handicapped a,

Or Whether  she is mad   or retarded,

She  becomes  a victim to the animal in man,

And so  the problem is not helplessness.

To prevent   all this and protect them,

Either   the law has to change  or we have to change,

Man has  been given  strength to protect women,

And not  trouble   her like an animal,

Even if you are  not able to see  them,

AS mother or sister ,  please do not see her as a prey.

Daughter Divine - poem dedicated to my daughter

Daughter  Divine

A poem dedicated to our daughter

By

P.R.Ramachander

Times have past  in a frenzy  , daughter  divine ,

Since  the day   when I lifted you  as a helpless  baby,

To stare  at you   with  pride  without bounds ,

Wanting  to shout , “Oh ,  how blessed I  am ,

To have a daughter    who is as sweet as  this little one”

In those  hapless  days  when  the great   God,

Was playing    with my life like the gambler’s dice,

When for days together   with tears  in the brinks of my eyes,

I was   staring   at a hopeless   future in the mid of cyclone of life.

When you opened   your  sweet little  mouth   to tell,

“Appa  , I like you a lot”, I turned in to  an acme of joy.

Years passed  and everyday   when I come back  from office,

When you used   to   ask me “What have you brought today, Appa?”

I was speech less   as well as  answerless  due to  an empty purse,

But  did I not tell you little one  , ‘Heaps and heaps  of unalloyed affection  for you.”

You grew up   in to a  bundle of silken    and golden affection ,

And  when  me used to   dream  and ask you “Who would be a scientist like me”

You without battling  of an eye   used to  say , “Me Appa”

But I knew even then dreams  seldom  turn in  to realty.

You  became an intelligent and affectionate  sweet little lass,

And   the day came   fast , when I had   to  wave my hands,

Helplessly  and  say   to you  . “Oh my god  what shall I do  without her?”

And the cruel God replied, “Wherever she  is, she would love you,”

And you did   that  my little treasure   and   have   become now,

The  walking stick   that I lean on    at this  very old age.

And when I stare   at the future  in a helpless  fashion,

You always tell me  “I love you Appa , Is it not enough?”

A loving Mother’s tips to her son after marriage

A loving Mother’s  tips   to her son  after marriage

By

P.R.Ramachander

(I got the idea of writing  this  in the form of a poem after reading a Tamil Write up   about  the advice that every mother   should give it to her just married son  by Jayaprakash Padma Siva Sankaran which was shared  by my friend  Suresh KR .I have  definitely taken  his idea  but   the  approach and write up is definitely mine.)

1.My dear   Son, who is dear to me,

Today   you   have   got  a companion,

Who is as   young   and bubbly as you,

And from tomorrow , she and you are  your family

2.Before   you start   the day one of your life ,

As your mother    who is your  first Guru ,

I have to teach  you  a lot, about how,

You should   treat your wife  who is your  friend.

3, I and she are  the  only women  in your life ,

Whose   only ambition   is to make you happy,

And we both , though   we had   a life of our own before,

Would give up   all that   we have,  for your sake.

4.Till now  as you  knew  me  as   the only  woman of your life,

Your mind   would  always    tend   to compare ,

Her, the new  lady   who has entered   your life , with me ,

In looks, behavior and skills in cooking and home management.

5.By doing this   you would be  making your own  life ,

Like a hell   full of miseries , pain   and troubles,

For I too was  exactly  like  her  twenty five years back,

As I lacked  experience  and  knowledge  and was similar to her.

6.Just like you, she  before   coming    to this house  as your wife,

Was an angel  to her parents , who brought her up,

Without  any care  and  were   full of worries,

Even  when a finger  of their   darling  daughter pained.

7.For her   to become  like  me , it would take time , because

For that  she has to learn to  be a wife  to the demanding you,

For that  she has  to bring  up  her own children,

Which would make  her a great wife  and mother like me.

8.Please understand   that   your wife  is not your mother,

Whose  only main task in  life till date was to look after  you,

But she is your friend, who is going   to be with you,

Through  thick and thin and share   all  your cares

9.Please   do not expect   that   love is a one sided coin,

It is a  mutual  journey of joy  , pain , laughter  and cares.

For it to succeed   you both have  to learn to respect ,

Each other  and also make your mission  to make  your partner happy.

10. She has left her  own home  where  she was a goddess,

To be with you  so that   she and you build up a  new home,

Please   try all that  you can  to make her  feel that  this home,

Is  no different  than her home , by possible change of yourselves.

11.Please  know   that   everyday   all your life  you have to love her,

And understand    that  love for each other  does not alter  with age

Praising her dress and looks  , praising   the food that she has  cooked,

Praising  her ability  to  do things and happily laughing  aloud are all parts of love.

12. To tell in a  few words   son, treat  her always and always ,

The way that  your father  treated me  all his life ,

Please  love   and respect her    and learn to be a part,

Of her life, her chores  , her worries and her anxieties.

Yours , mine and ours - Practical philosophy in a nutshell

Yours  , mine and ours  -  Practical philosophy in a nutshell

From

 Face book page of  Mannargudi  Sitaraman  Srinivasan

Translated by

P.R.Ramachander

I told   yours is not mine- peace came

I told mine  is not yours- Enmity came,

I told mine is mine only- Aloofness came,

I told mine is yours- affection came,

I told   everything is yours- rewards came,

I told  yours  is yours only – recognitions came ,

I told ours  is ours only -  Unity came,

I told everything is every ones- greatness came

I told yous is mine- Quarrel came

I told everything is us-war came

I told   everything is for me only-sorrow  came,

I told what for is all this-  Joy came

I told everything is sweet-sweetness came,

Mind told  nothing is forever- good conduct came,

I stared   at my inside-meditation came,

I told world  is not yours, n body is not yours-Light came,

I told nothing is yours and nothing is ours  - detachment came

I Told there is no need to live and no need to beg-Wisdom  came

உன்னவை என்னவை இல்லை என்றேன்
நிம்மதி வந்தது
என்னவை உன்னவை இல்லை என்றேன்
பகை வந்தது

என்னவை என்னதே என்றேன்
தனிமை வந்தது

என்னவை உன்னவை என்றேன்
பாசம் வந்தது
எல்லாம் உம்மவை என்றேன்
பரிசு வந்தது

உன்னவை உன்னவையே என்றேன்
மதிப்பு வந்தது

நம்மவை நம்மவையே என்றேன்
ஒற்றுமை வந்தது

எல்லாம் பொதுமை என்றேன்
பெருமை வந்தது

உன்னவை என்னவை என்றேன்
உரசல் வந்தது

எல்லாம் நம்மவையே என்றேன்
போர் வந்தது

எல்லாம் எனக்கே என்றேன்
துன்பம் வந்தது

எல்லாம் ஏதுக்கு என்றேன்
இன்பம் வந்தது

எல்லாம் இனிமையே என்றேன்
இனிமையே வந்தது

மனது இதுவும் நிரந்தரமல்ல என்றது
ஒழுக்கம் வந்தது

உள்ளத்து உள்ளே உற்றுப் பார்த்தேன்
தியானம் வந்தது

உடலும் உனதல்ல உலகும் உனதல்ல
ஒளி வந்தது

எதுவுமே உனதல்ல யாதுமே நமதல்ல
மோனம் வந்தது

இருத்தலும் வேண்டாம் இரத்தலும் வேண்டாம்
ஞானம் வந்தது

Matching horoscopes for Matrimony

Matching  horoscopes  for Matrimony

By

P.R.Ramachander

   Though   this subject is  not  described   either  in Ramayana , Mahabharatha  or Bhagawatha , the system of  matching horoscopes  of the bride and groom plays an important   role  in arranged marriages in India.

   With the steep falling  of sex ratio  possibly because  of the steep   reduction  in the average family    size, Matching of horoscopes is considered   as the chief  hindrance   in arranging  marriages..Here are  the problems  people face:-

1.No two astrologers   agree.

2.The procedure  for matching of horoscopes  not only  changes from state  to state  but also   from person  to person.

3.Most of the people  do not believe   that  matching  of horoscopes   have any thing   to with success  in marriage.

4,.To the common man it appears   that  the chance of marriage  failing   is same both  in  arranged  marriages   and love marriages

5.There  is a common feeling  that  the astrologers keep on telling horoscopes do not match till  the  person becomes desperate   and then make  him spend  lots of money on Pariharams, Gems  , Homams   and visit of temples,

6.Due to this most of the parents   do not match horoscopes  but use it as a convenient tool   to reject  marriage  proposals  which they do not like

    I am a statistician by profession  and had been engaged  in matching  of horoscopes  as a service and  after  doing it for 20 years, I have concluded that  the probability of happy marriage   is slightly  higher (60-70%)  if  the horoscopes  are matched.

    What   do you all think ? If you  all think   that this  is the greatest hindrance  for  people getting married, then we will have to think of how   to  get rid  of  this  procedure.

Please do not waste even a single grain-It is a crime against humanity

 Please do not waste   even a single grain-It is a crime   against humanity 

From the posting  of Ravikumar P   in the face book:-

Translated by

P.R.Ramachander

The   grain of   cooked rice in your plate,

Saved itself from rats  when it was  growing,

Escaped when the   grain awns   were beaten,

Escaped   when it was getting filled up in the jute bag,

Escaped when paddy husk was  removed in the mill,

Escaped when we were  taking out the chaff,

Escaped from dropping down in the shop   when it was being sold  ,

Escaped  by not dropping on the floor   when it was being cooked,

And escaped by not getting scattered  when it was being served on your plate,

And do you think it is proper /just   to waste   that  precious grain ,

Which has been escaping   in  various stages  of its life.

Please do not waste food