One does not want
our one because we had only one
By
P.R.Ramachander
Once upon a
time there was
no family planning being practiced
in India. Every home had several
siblings –some of them male and some
female .Most of the families were poor or lower
middle class . There was a great
competition among brides and grooms to get married in homes
with only one son . This was because
they thought that all
the money earned by the parents of that person would come to him . No one
ever thought that parents
would be a burden to them
In fact if a
person did not look after his
parents the whole society shunned him . Most of the children were very much dependent on their inherited wealth
Then the concept
of family planning was
introduced.People came to know
that if they have less
children , then their earned assets
would go to few children and so
ecomically their children would
progress .The govt said , “we two, ours two” Within a short time most of the Brahmins became upper middle class .They
educated their few children (one or
two) extremely well.Soon the children
became rich , Initially , thinking that
daughters would go away to other families , the family spent
money on educating sons only
.With sons becoming rich , they started supporting their parents and sisters,So soon
all children got educated well
and became financially well
off and self dependent.
A stage came
when neither a son nor
the daughters were interested in the
inherited wealth . They were much
, much richer than their parents and they wanted their children to further progress economically
.So a new concept that , while it is the duty of parents to look after their children , it was not the duty of children to lok after their parents
arose among children,.The parents however thought that their children should look after them as it was their duty.
In the present
days most of the Brahmins had only one or two children . Some families have
two sons, some two daughters , some
one son and a daughter , some
only one son and some one daughter only ,
This
unfortunately affected the matrimonial choices of both boys and girls
1.No boy wanted to marry in a family where there are only one or two daughters.He started thinking that apart from his burden of looking after his parents, he has also to look after his parents-in-laws.Most of girls from such
families told the groom that she
would be giving her parents a
part of her income to her parents and once she told this, the grooms rejected
her.
2.No girl wanted to get married in to a family with either one son or a son and daughter .Her logic is that , her
parents in law would become an
exclusive burden on her .
Most of the
parents promise such grooms and
brides that they would live alone
and would not be a burden for
them.But the children do not have full trust
in such words . They feel
Parents would become old and helpless and then , they would become a burden on them.
This is an
extremely serious issue in arranging marriage ,Is there any solution.?
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