Old age –Quo vadis?
Compiled by
P.R.Ramachander
Whenever two old
people meet each other, they talk of how
their children are not bothered about
them and may put them in some old
age home. Is their worry justified-My
opinions based on a write up by Kovai
Anuradha on this subject as a preface
to his new drama Mamiyar 65:-
There are two
types of old age homes-one to take
care of people who do not have money run free of charge and the other for rich senior citizens who can
pay /whose children pay rent,
their food expenses and their medical
expenses called Senior citizen homes Though we see very many advertisements for both these type of homes, their number would be around 2000 in the four southern states of India. Assuming that this it true
and the number of people in each
such homes are about 500, the maximum number of old people
living in the southern states as of now
would be about one lakh .Suppose I have erred in my estimates , and even if we double the number the number of people living in old age homes would be around 2 lakhs. But as we all know the
number of people older than 65 that was estimated in 2014 census was
around 6% of the total
population . The total population of South India was recently estimated at around 25 crores leading to an estimate of around 1.6 crores of old people in south india. So only a very very minute ie 2
people out of 160 people
are living in these type of homes.
Sri Kovai
Anuradha one of my friend
in face book who is a great writer
and a great actor , surveyed
some of these old age homes before he wrote the script for a drama on this theme and he found out that
The people who
choose to live in old age
homes are:-
1.People whose
children are living abroad and they themselves do not prefer to live in the cold climate there.
2.People who are
left at home alone by children who are both employed
3.People
whose children are themselves
senior citizens
4,People who are having only daughters and who do
not want to live in daughter’s home
5.People who do
not have any children
6.People who
would like to live independently and
not with family
6.People who
are not wanted by their children(small
number)
I agree with my
friend , when he writes that all our children are affectionate and
consider their parents as Gods .This is
much more so among the poor people ,
whose parents you would rarely find in old age homes. He
also found out that many old
age people are not able to adjust
with young people because:-
1.They consider
cooking in micro wave oven , induction
stove and gas stove are not suitable for orthodox cooking as they cannot be cleaned using water/cow dung after every cooking and would prefer to cook in coal stove which
makes ashes fly all over the house.
2.They are not able to adjust
to the modern day furnituresand their modern upkeep as they were
not bothered about them earlier.
3.Instructing son not to buy sweets to his wife and
children because they have diabetes or
asking daughter in law to use less salt
in all dishes cooked as they have
high BP or asking s daughter in law not
to prepare fried items for all because as they do not have teeth
4.Talking in a
loud voice in the phone and complaining
about how their daughter in law ,
torments them, though she looks
after them properly.
5.Watching TV
with loud sound(your hearing is poor)
and disturbing the family of your son/daughter, especially children who are studying
6.Go on telling about the problems created by your children’s family to all your friends including the maid servant.
7.Getting angry with your wife and shouting
at her before your children and
grand children
8.Hiding things so that
they can give it to her other
children
9.All the 24 hours
complaining and complaining
And so on and so on
Kovai Anuradhe
says “If only they adjust to modern times and are capable of considering all their
relatives , including their daughter in laws as their friends , things would be
different , He says human beings after certain age should be like wood apple fruits, whose outer shell would be thick and
inside the fruit would not get
attached to the shell ,He
also indicates that the responsibility of every home should be shared among all
members which include youngsters and old people, He has written a drama called Mamiyar 65 @ hotmail..com based
on this thought process of his.As per Hindu the story
of the drama unfolds like this:-
“Janaki, a homemaker, takes care of the daily chores of her
household, the foremost being caring for her elderly in-laws.
The scene never changes even after her son’s wedding. In
fact, the situation worsens as Janaki ends up doing things for both her
mother-in-law and her working daughter-in-law. No one in the family tries to
understand her commitment towards the family and they continue to ignore her
interests. This worries Mani Iyer, the late father of Janaki, who comes to her
rescue in the form of a poltergeist. He brings the atrocities being committed
against Janaki to the notice of his son-in-law Kalyanaraman and seeks justice.
He also urges Kalyanaraman to insist on sharing of responsibilities among the
family members. Mani Iyer’s advice helps Kalyanaraman understand the sufferings
of his wife. Soon, Kalyanaraman and Janaki leave for Vaideeswarankoil but they
never return. Later the police inform the family about the recovery of
Kalyanaraman’s mobile from near the railway track. Whether the sudden change in
situation had an impact on the family, formed the rest of the story. Since the writer himself is an active member if the face book , let us
await him to tell us this.
I would very much
like to know what my young and old friends think about it
1 comment:
My namaskarams to you
You have very well written about the present day status of old people in our society.
A coin is having two sides. i.e. head and tail. Similarly all age group of people are having their own thinking about them. every human being is unique in their thinking and always defends whatever they are doing is correct. Finding faults with others is very easy and accepting our own fault is very difficult. Any how we can adjust with others very easily without much difficulty. what we have to do is to forgo our ego. Always love and affection showered upon others will be coming back to us in many folds.Be patient; Be calm; accept whatever comes as it is. don't expect too much from others. give & take concept will always work very nicely.Be happy and make others also happy. We have to share our sorrows and happiness with others. Always moving with children will make us feel younger. Age is not decided by physical years which we have completed. For mental age is depending our way of thinking.
You have more experienced than me and you are already doing lot of your noble services to mankind. I am praying Lord Parameshwara will shower all His Blessings upon You & Your Family.
S. Srinivasan
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